In My Head

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I have always had an active mind, it has become almost impossible for me to hear from the spirit world because I have to double check the actions and body movements I make- if they are as a result of the flow of the spirit of God or just my mind making my body sway to the soft tune of the scale being run on the piano by that very very fine pianists.

I remember the day I was filled with the Holy Spirit, it was an unexpected occurrence. It happened during a camp meeting. I invited one of my male friends who also invited a friend of his. I was 15.

So there we were in the front of the altar, some standing, some kneeling all where seeking the face of God, the unfilled where asking to be filled. I too was asking to be filled. My friend and his friend were in the congregation such sinners they where. I looked left and right, people where falling to the ground on their own accord. No body laid hands on them. They were falling and speaking in other tongues as the Spirit gave them utterance. I stood my ground, I was going to let God do his work and not my mind.

After a torturing while looking at people speak in other tongues, I too began to sway left and right. I was scared, this could be my mind playing games on me so I stayed put to see if I would sway again, yes I did. I swayed and swayed and fell to the ground and I began speaking with other tongues just like that and it wasn't my mind playing tricks on me, it was God.

 I've been making scenarios in my head since I was 9 and I'm not even joking. You need to be in my head to see all the things I've thought about; people I've killed, people I've wedded, children I've birthed, money I've handled. Till now, I don't know which one is more epic my marriage with Justin Bieber or with Zac Efron. I've traveled the world and I'm still traveling in my head. I've been to the moon in my head. Just this morning, I took a guy out and feasted on a whole cake at an eatery while he snaps me photos with my iPhone11, also in my head.

It's comfortable in there, there's no pressure and things actually do go my way. I want to live in my head for a lifetime. Time is nonexistent in there. I don't grow old and I can get the man of my dreams but good things don't last and love isn't real, oblivion is inevitable and time waits for no one and if I continue living in my head then I'll never get a life, a real life.

Comments

  1. Greatwomenalive September 10, 2019 at 10:54 AM

    "IT'S COMFORTABLE IN THERE,THERE'S NO PRESSURE AND THINGS ACTUALLY DO GO MY WAY."SAME here with me life is so much more interesting in my head.No pressure.The last part of this write up is so relatable.Keep up the fine writing and wild imaginations

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